The holidays can be the most meaningful times in our lives.  They can also prove to be the most stressful – if not the most damaging – particularly in terms of the future.

What we do (or don’t do) during the holidays can depend tremendously on how psychically aware we are about our lives and those who interact with us.

Personal Prophesy readings which use ordinary playing cards as the focal point for intuition perception can easily provide us with this all-important insight.

When I conduct readings for others during the holiday season, a huge item on my agenda as I perceive their lives through the cards is helping them not create a new negative holiday memory that will literally last forever.

I urge recipients of my readings to take a deep breath and a big step back in order to realistically consider the heartbreak they are setting themselves up for should they make poor choices for themselves during such an emotionally-charged time of the year.

Think back on your own past holiday experiences.  What comes to mind first?  Happy holiday memories, hopefully.  For many among us, however, our first remembrances are extremely negative.  What do those memories, the negative ones, do?  They linger endlessly in our own memory banks and quite often will affect the way we celebrate the holiday season far into the future.

Personal Prophesy readings have taught me over the years that Holiday Do’s and Don’ts are:

*  Give from the spirit if you can’t give from the heart.

The spirit believes in unconditional love and kindness because it is so intricately connected to the Universe itself.  Give in to your spiritual side during the holidays.  We all have family members, ex-spouses and friends who have let us down in the past.  Possibly in incredibly major ways.

Would it kill us to extend some kindness toward them on the spiritual level, even if it’s only in a simple expression of “Merry Christmas” or “Please have a happy new year”?

Probably not.

Doing so will also be a big shot in the arm where our own spirituality is concerned.

On the other hand, if you can’t bring yourself to take that step physically, do it completely on the spiritual level.  Say a prayer for that individual.  Help someone less fortunate who crosses your path and provide that help as a spiritual offering in the name of someone who has hurt you in the past. You’ll be amazed at how blessed you become in your own life as a result!

*  If you have children, buy their mother or father a gift on behalf of your kids.

Remember, it isn’t so much the gift  itself that’s important, it’s what you are teaching your children by making that gift possible for them to hold in their hands and be able to give to the other parent in their lives that matters.

Children can feel so emotionally torn during the holidays.  They love unconditionally both of their parents, after all.  They want desperately during the holidays to be able to express that love.  These kids never asked to suddenly find themselves refugees of a marriage or a committed relationship gone wrong that has since transformed into a messy divorce or a custody battle.  They deserve to be taught the rightness of having a gift to give to that other parent – even if it isn’t a parent they have the chance to see very often.

These are things your children will remember far into adulthood and help them to learn solid lessons about life to pass down to their own children one day:  The positive lessons they were taught about giving from you.  The positive lessons they were taught about simply loving and honoring their parents – as distanced and apart as those parents might be. Again, lessons learned from you.

Such a gesture made through your children, providing a gift for them to give to that other parent, will accomplish all of that.  It doesn’t matter how much of a rat their father was as a husband or how deficient their mother might have been as a wife during the marriage.  Focus on the fact that you are teaching your children something important about giving and loving.  The other parent will understand the lesson being taught by graciously receiving that gift.

*  Don’t dwell on issues that have yet to be fully resolved.

This means especially with your own existing partners, family members, in-laws and friends.  If you are in the midst of a situation, don’t bring that baggage into the holidays you are trying to celebrate.  Yes, of course, you have every reason to analyze and debate “this” or “that” in terms of your relationships with these people, but let the cards and your own better judgment guide you as you celebrate the holiday season.

Family members and friends?  It doesn’t hurt to just try to give a little of yourself through, say, a card extending a bit of your own humanity. It also makes you a better person within the scope of the Universe.  But if you can’t bring yourself to buy them a gift, you can always donate to a worthy cause in their name with global charities like Heifer International.

You are really gifting the less fortunate in the world by doing so.

An ex your heart is is struggling with who wants to make a new start with you?  Give it a try.  The holiday season is, after all, focused on rebirth and the celebration of life.  You really have nothing to lose and everything to gain by taking such a step, particularly at this time of the year.

If the two of you are able to create a new beginning as you celebrate the holidays, you’ll have this holiday season to look back on and remember.  If the relationship just can’t achieve solid footing, once the holidays have passed you will at least have a good memory to place in your memory banks and not a negative one.

With that relationship fully resolved, you won’t have any baggage to take with you into the holiday season next year.